Lord Byron wrote, “The heart will break, but broken live on.” These words become the essence of writer-director Noah Pritzker’s, Ex-Husbands, a moving new film that examines the intergenerational coming to terms with heartbreak and divorce for a father and his two grown sons. Written and directed with compassion and respect for character, Pritzker finds truth in the uncertainty of life after the loss of love and in the deeply felt bond between fathers and sons. 

Parents can only do their best to infuse their children with enough love and knowledge to help them navigate life as adults. There is a certain helplessness as we watch our sons and daughters get older, knowing that, one day, it will be our job to step back and let them find their own way. The inevitability of missteps and heartbreak is in the cards for everyone. As parents, we are always there for our kids, but it can be a struggle to see them experience emotional pain. When our children’s heartache mirrors our own, the weight of such a realization can be crippling or it can strengthen the familial resolve. For the characters in Ex-Husbands, both outcomes will color their collective paths.

There is a bit of Paul Mazursky in the seemingly organic dialogue and off-kilter situations that give way to emotional catharsis. There is humor to be mined in how the film’s three main characters are drowning in crisis after the self-sabotage of their respective romantic relationships, but this cannot be considered a comedy. There are some smiles, but they come from an observational perspective. We laugh at the folly of a married man in his 80s wanting to leave his wife for bachelorhood, but the “joke” gives way to something more innately human. The impact of his declaration will affect how his son handles his own marriage troubles. Pritzker finds the right tone and sticks to it, crafting his picture with sincerity. 

Peter Pearce (Griffin Dunne) is an unhappy New York dentist in his late sixties going through a divorce. His father, Simon (Richard Benjamin, in a good turn), wants to divorce Peter’s mother. The two have been married for 65 years, but Simon is under the impression he would do well getting back in the dating game. This conversation opens the film and is performed by two old pros giving the type of inviting and finely-tuned performances that have defined their respective careers. 

Griffin Dunne has always been at home playing characters just on the border of neurotic, but grounded in reality. No matter the vibe of the film around him, the actor has always been skillful inhabiting men in emotional crisis. It is immediately apparent he is the perfect fit to play Peter. Dunne’s deadpan reactions to the absurdity of his father’s situation (and the reality of his own marital crisis) are a perfect balance of the humor and sadness that find uneasy alliance in Peter’s current emotional state.

Richard Benjamin has certainly made a successful career out of playing comically high strung New Yorkers, but did some interesting and grounded work in 1969’s Goodbye Columbus, 1972’s Portnoy’s Complaint and 1973’s The Last of Sheila and Westworld. In these diverse films, Benjamin showed an adventurous ability to play strong-willed/misguided (sometimes emotionally corrupt) men; the type he would no longer be offered as his career slipped more into comedy. As Simon, the actor has only a few scenes, but does some of the most moving work of his 60-plus year career. 

Time has passed since the conversation between Peter and his father. His mother (Marcia Jean Kurtz) has died and wife of 35 years, Maria (Rosanna Arquette, reuniting with her After Hours co-star), has filed for divorce. Doing his best to settle into a new apartment, Peter is overwhelmed with many different emotions. As a life without the woman he loves takes shape, the struggle with thoughts of a reconciliation he knows will never come are too much. A flight to Tulum, Mexico might be the right remedy for Peter to clear his mind. A relaxing, sunny, getaway may allow a clearer head to better process the end of his marriage. 

Peter and Maria have two adult sons; Nick (James Norton) and Mickey (Miles Heizer). Mickey has recently come out as a gay man, but is hesitant to date. This reluctance could be a side effect of watching the dissolution of his parent’s decades-long marriage. Nick is the handsome older brother working as a waiter whose impending marriage to Thea (Rachel Zeiger-Haag) may not be the blissful future he was hoping to find. 

In a move that may feel like a plot contrivance, Peter “happens” to book the same city and hotel as Nick, Mickey and his friends, who are all there for Nick’s bachelor party. Dad agrees to keep his presence separate from his son’s good time excursion, although a desire to check in will be an entryway into a much needed bonding between three men in flux.

Peter and his two sons navigate a new chapter in their lives. For Peter and Nick, their respective relationship woes are more their own doing than they realize while newly-out Mickey is trying to prevent himself from seeing romance through jaded eyes. Each man is in pursuit of a stability that is currently out of their reach. Peter feels a spark in a chance connection with a fellow vacationer, Eileen (Eisa Davis). Nick carries on with the party activities but feels the suffocating weight of a secret he struggles to share with his friends. Mickey finds his own spark with a man who couldn’t be further from the right companion.

Pritzker’s screenplay sees endings as the nucleus of the three men’s lives. Peter and Maria’s divorce is cause for a deep reflection that opens challenging new chapters for all. Peter and his sons are in a world of loneliness and confused self-worth that feels unfamiliar, not realizing they were the architects of their own downfalls. Where they once lived life by moving (to quote Bruce Springsteen) “one step up and two steps back”, Peter, Nick, and Mickey are forced to examine what brought them to such a crossroads.

The shared experience between Peter and his sons leads to some moving scenes of empathy and the power of a father’s love for his children. The film’s most compelling scene comes when Peter makes a speech to Nick and his friends, letting his son know how proud he is of the man he has become. Peter isn’t seeing this moment through rose-colored glasses, as his thoughts are genuine and from the heart. When he tells them all to hold on to their friendships because this will be the light in the darker times, Peter’s profound wisdom and naked emotion touch the soul of those on screen and off. People are flawed. Times get rough. As life goes on, it will be our connections to those we love that will sustain us. Perhaps it is only in this very moment where Peter realizes the weight of his own words. 

By the film’s end, there is a glimmer of hope that shines through the shades of loss; a phoenix from the ashes for Peter and his boys.

Ex-Husbands breathes authenticity and heart. Noah Pritzker brings kindness and compassion to a relatable story of identity and change. There is no judgement towards the actions of his characters. Mistakes are made while humor and sadness walk hand in hand. 

And so it goes for us all. 

Ex-Husbands

Written and Directed by Noah Pritzker

Starring Griffin Dunne, James Norton, Miles Heizer, Richard Benjamin, Rosanna Arquette, Elisa Davis, John Ventimiglia

NR, 98 Minutes, Greenwich Entertainment, Rathaus Films, Bold Choices Productions, Pimienta Films